A Bit More Good News...

We are encouraged again today! First, Marc's treatment cycle seems to be a bit better this go around. We have been diligent about keeping up on anti-nausea medication and an additional medication to help with the irritation of his small intestine. While he is in no way feeling great, he isn't feeling as horrible as he was two weeks ago. He's really tired, but hanging in there.

Second, he asked today to see his test results from Tuesday. This tumor marker shows his progress from his third treatment. His marker was down to 131! Down another 77 points. We are so excited!

Thanks again for your prayers!

Some Good News to Share...

We have good news to share today. Two weeks ago, after Marc's second treatment, they did a blood test to measure his tumor marker. They do this at every appointment. The day of his first treatment Marc's tumor marker was at 240 (after rising the week prior from 140). After one treatment the marker only increased to 288. The doctor thought that was good news (it was showing signs of reacting and slowing), but that we should continue to expect the marker to rise or, at best, plateau after the second treatment. Well, today we found out that his tumor marker was at 208! It dropped 80 points in one treatment! It didn't go up, didn't plateau...it dropped by a large measure. We are very excited by this news!

The doctor also noted that his abdomen continues to soften and the tumor area that he can feel is shrinking. So, we won't be getting a PT scan for another month. The doctor didn't think it is necessary because he can tell from the tumor marker and his physical exam that the cancer is responding. The plan now is to finish up the next four months of treatment and pray for complete remission. We were encouraged today by an elderly gentleman in the treatment center. He had finished the same regimen Marc is on a month ago. He is doing fine and was in for a routine appointment. And...he still had his hair (a bonus). It was a huge encouragement to meet someone that had been through this very treatment and was thriving.

Thank you for your prayers and concern. We are excited to share good news when we get it. There is nothing better than celebrating answered prayers with friends and loved ones. God continues to be good and merciful!

With love and gratitude...

Uncle!

"Have You not made a hedge around him, around his household and around all that he has on every side? You have blessed the work of his hands, and his possessions have increased in the land. But now, stretch out Your hand and touch all that he has, and he will surely curse You to Your face!"

Satan's conversation with God, regarding Job
Job 1: 9-11

I'm feeling a bit Job-esque this week. My hedge seems to have been compromised and I'm being lambasted left and right by sorrows and frustration. I feel like the kid on the playground having my arm twisted by the bully. "Uncle! I cry uncle!" Just when I don't think I can take much more, then a new load of misery follows.

Cancer is no walk in the park. These past few weeks have had us on our knees. We have seen God at work in Marc's illness, though, and we know his cancer serves a greater purpose. We believe that and cling to it. It doesn't make it less difficult. As each treatment and test approaches we are anxious. It's hard being at the start of a story like this without knowing how it will end. We just have to wait. But, while we have been waiting more tests of our character have taken place. Our lives have become like one of those info-mercials... Wait! There is more!

We could really use your prayer in the coming weeks. Here are some of the highlights...

1. Marc's next round of chemo is tomorrow. Please pray that:

• The cancer will continue to respond

• He doesn't suffer the nausea and vomiting like the last go round


• The pain is minimal


• His fatigue is minimal


• We can schedule the next PT scan and that the results of the scan are encouraging
  

2. My grandmother is losing her life to cancer. Please pray that:

• Her pain can be controlled


• My parents and great aunt can continue to have the emotional and physical strength to care for her 24/7


• That we all have peace about her passing
  

3. My brother is returning home on leave from his training in the army. Please pray that:

• We are able to enjoy this week with family -- amidst chemo and serving Grandma
  
• We have peace about his deployment to Iraq


• He has safety while he is deployed

4. We found out this week that we have legal meetings regarding our house fire (drama 2007) in the next three weeks. (Our insurance company is trying to recoup the damages from the contractor that did the work. We have to testify). Please pray that:

• We have no scheduling conflicts with Marc's chemo


• That everyone will be truthful and that those making judgements are fair and honest.
  
• That they can settle out of court.

Add to all these concerns the usual dose of daily challenges, and we wonder how we are able to function on a daily basis. Oddly enough, we seem to still be hanging in there. We find ourselves not panicking too much about the various trials in our lives. We have realized that there isn't much we can control or fix. We can only do our part. I will say this, though. Marc and I have been complimented for how "strong" we have been during this crisis. I want to clarify something....we aren't strong. Any strength, any grace, any courage, that we have is a direct gift from God. We ran out of strength a long time ago. We have heard many times from well meaning folks that God never gives us more than we can handle. I don't know that that is altogether true. I believe this is the verse that most people refer to:

No temptation has overtaken you except such as is common to man; but God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will also make the way of escape, that you may be able to bear it. 1 Corinthians 10:13

I think God is allowing us to be tested right now, knowing that there is no way that I or Marc can handle these burdens on our own. He's given us more than enough to cope, though. He gave us Himself. I can bear it because he is bearing it for me. His shoulders are broad and His hands caring! I can go to bed at night and rest, and then have the courage to get out of bed in the morning...simply because I'm not doing it alone.

I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. Philippians 4:12-13

So, if you are seeing us as some sort of beacons of strength....Don't! You are seeing God at work when we appear strong. For when we are weak, His strength abounds. So, that brings us back to poor Job. I'm liking that guy more and more. Despite all he went through, he never did curse God. Amazing. I want to be like him. It would be tempting to blame God for all that has transpired in the past few weeks, but I know that would be wrong and totally mis-directed. He is letting me learn from this and it does hurt; however, he hasn't forsaken us and we know that somehow, in some way, God will see us through.

Lastly, we know many of you are struggling with your own trials and frustrations right now. You may have more than you can bear, but I pray that you find courage and strength from God. He is faithful. He can be trusted. He is more than able....

Thank you for your prayers and for meeting me here. We are grateful to all of you.

With love and gratitude...

Soaking it up

Come now, you who say, "today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, spend a year there, buy and sell, and make a profit"; whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away.

James 4: 13-14

The sun came out again this weekend. We found ourselves drawn outdoors to play and do yard work. I apologize for not posting sooner, but I couldn't force myself to sit in front of my computer when I could be outside having fits with my lawnmower. This time it was the starter that was stuck. It ended up being a really technical fix, though. Marc showed me exactly where to hit the casing with a hammer. Voila!

This past week was pretty brutal. We have been expecting the side effects of the chemo to decrease with each treatment; however, that hasn't been the case for Marc. This round was his hardest yet and makes facing next week all that much harder. He finally rallied on Friday and was able to enjoy most of the weekend. We are finding that I'm able to support him during his "down" days pretty well. After he has recovered, though, I crash emotionally. Our moods have become juxtaposed, making the emotional aspect of this trial much like two roller coasters passing each other on the fly.

We have been making the most of Marc's time off. During his good days we are able to do a lot with the kids that we wouldn't otherwise be able to do when he is working. Today we took a day trip to Silver Falls. We lugged the kids, lunch, the puppy, and the jogger stroller, to the park for a picnic and hiking. The day was beautiful and we enjoyed a lovely drive and a good time checking out the falls. I found myself conflicted, though, as I have a lot in the last few weeks. Despite how fun the activity, I feel a heaviness...a shadow cast that I can't escape. Knowing how serious Marc's illness is makes me wonder how long we have to enjoy these times. How many more hikes can we have? How many camping trips? Birthday parties? Christmases? I worry that cancer threatens to curtail our future days together.

While my mind wanders there, it doesn't stay. All I have to do is read the news for a wake up call. Car crashes, accidents, acts of violence (to name a few) all fill the headlines. A simple reminder that life can take an abrupt turn at any given moment. Like most, I once made the assumption that there is always time for another hike, another vacation, another hug. The cloud that hangs over me is the strong desire for the assurance that Marc and I have tons of time to do what we love with the people we love. We don't know what tomorrow brings, or next month, or years from now. I am forever changed because I now know that assurance can never be mine -- and never was.

This lesson is one that we have taken to heart. Cancer has taught us not to take one day or one person for granted. Right after Marc was diagnosed I was having coffee with a friend at the grocery store. I watched an elderly couple come in to do their shopping. I was hit with the most powerful pang of envy. I wanted to be them. I want to be that couple -- old, married forever, shopping with my husband. Nothing glamorous...just together. My envy quickly gave way to anger, though. The gentleman paused to look at a display while the wife carried on to do her shopping. Realizing he wasn't keeping up, she turned and snarled an insult at him. I was so angry, I wanted to shake that woman! "Don't be unkind! Don't say something that you will regret! Don't you realize how fortunate you are?!? You have your husband and are fortunate to be together...shopping! Don't waste it with petty arguments and selfishness!"

If we could share one piece of wisdom, it would be this: Life is too short and loved ones too precious to spend time harboring anger or acting selfishly. You never know when life is going to take an abrupt turn. Be ready. Forgive if you need to forgive. Seek reconciliation if a relationship needs mending. But, most of all, enjoy those that God has given you to love. Don't take one moment for granted. Don't waste it! Soak it up!

A few pictures from our adventures today....

The Gift of Hospitality

Be hospitable to one another without grumbling. As each one has received a gift, minister it to one another, as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.

1 Peter 4:9-10

My friend, Jennifer, and her sweet family

I have learned to like to entertain; however, I'm a no frills hostess at best. If you come to my home for lunch, you'll likely get a paper plate and a plastic cup. If you're lucky, I might pull out the plastic Bob the Builder plate...but that would be as fancy as I get. And, if you have been to my house more than three times, I would expect that you would open my fridge and cupboards and help yourself. I often serve buffet style, out of the pan I cook in (gasp). No serving dishes or fancy presentation here. You get the picture, right?

I never really think about how I serve or entertain. I'm utilitarian and I like efficiency...end of thought process. That is, until I met Jennifer. This sweet friend of mine has an AMAZING knack for hospitality. It is a gift. She treated me and my girls to lunch for the first time several months ago and I was struck by how beautiful everything was presented. Cake on a footed platter, fruit salad in a cut glass bowl, meats and cheese on a platter...We ate off of plates and drank from glasses made from...well... glass. No bouncing dinnerware here. I commented on how lovely everything looked and reflected back on their lunch at my home (see paragraph 1). Yikes. Jennifer, being a gracious and lovely woman, smiled and said something that stuck with me. She said something along the lines of, "I have all these things and it's no trouble using them." I think about my own cupboards and the number of cut glass bowls, serving platters in every shape and size, and the breakable dinner plates. It really isn't any trouble to use them, but for some reason I'm always saving them for a special occasion that never comes.

Jennifer always makes me and my family feel special. Every other week she takes my girls while Marc has his chemotherapy. She brings them into her home and makes them feel important and welcome. We pick the girls up and they spend the car ride home telling us about the fun they had and the special girly things they got to do. Jennifer has also spoiled us with amazing meals that she has had ready when we pick up the girls. And, wouldn't you know...they are all presented in her lovely dishes.

I think about Jennifer and I think about her Christ like mentality. She has the gift of generosity and hospitality. She is gracious and sweet. She sacrifices her Tuesdays without a hint of complaint, allowing Marc and me to be together on his treatment day. That is a true gift to us and we are so grateful.

Jennifer makes me think about God and how He is powerfully generous and gracious. God doesn't ever serve anything to us on his second best. His gifts are pure and perfect. I'm sure glad he didn't send his second-best son to cover my sin and give me eternal life. Instead, he gave us His absolute best. There is a lot to learn from God's grace and abundance. I am learning that every moment with a loved one -- be it a spouse, child, friend, or family member -- is a special occasion. Making those we care about feel loved and welcome isn't trouble. It just takes some thought and the willingness to sacrifice our best.

Thank you, Jennifer, for making me and my family always feel special and welcome. Thank you for the gift of your friendship, for listening and encouraging, for sharing transparently about your own losses. We are forever grateful for the hours you give us to be together to go to Marc's appointments and chemotherapy. It is a precious time for us.

With love and gratitude...

Answered Prayers

Thank you so much for praying on our behalf today. All went well and the reports remain encouraging. The doctor continues to notice a change in the tumor. He thinks it is still shrinking. He did note, however, that he does not think this tumor is rapidly growing and it isn't rapidly shrinking. He called it a "durable response." I guess slow and steady is the name of the game -- a good thing according to the doctor. I'm certain that by the time we survive this I will be able to speak Oncologogese fluently. Deciphering what is good and what is bad in the world of cancer is like playing Whose on First. Soooo confusing...

Anyhow, Marc's overall health was an encouragement to the doctor. His pain is still gone, his abdomen is softening, and his digestive system is better than it has been in months. The fact that he tolerates his treatments well is a huge advantage. Once again, we felt encouraged and blessed today.

I was able to sit the entire time today with Marc during his chemo treatment. The clinic is a busy place! You wouldn't believe the number of people that they treat in a given day -- men, women, old, and young. A couple by the name of Mae and Gordon sat by us today. Gordon is 74 and has lung cancer. While the men took their treatments I was able to visit with Mae. I told her our story and she just shook her head. She thought our situation was so tragic. Then she told me their story and I shook my head. I thought her situation was tragic, too. You see, Gordon and Mae have four children, but they are all grown. They don't visit and this couple spends their days alone. Mae is on her own, taking care of her ailing husband. The highlight of her week is when the nurse stops in on them, and that service ended this week. While Marc and I are concerned about our future, we are comforted daily by the energy and joy our children bring. We are blessed with our church body, many good friends, and loving family. While there is an element of tragedy in being young with a serious illness, I think it no less a tragedy that this aging couple is without support and much faith. If you think of this couple, please pray for them. It humbles me that God would bless us so abundantly with so much support and yet this couple is on their own.

So if you ever wonder if your phone call, email message, blog post, or conversation over coffee really helps...It does! Your faithful friendship and care is never a bother or an intrusion. We can't imagine going through this without all of you. Thank you!

Please pray

It's Monday night and Marc's treatment is tomorrow. Boy how time flies! It seems like the three days on treatment last an eternity, but his eleven "good" days speed by in record time. His last treatment was a rough one. Neither of us know what to expect tomorrow. It is likely it may be tough again. We feel blessed, though. He seems to recover by the fourth day -- Friday. For that we are grateful.

A few simple prayer requests if you would like to pray for us. Please pray that:

• We will hear encouraging news from the doctor tomorrow
• That our spirits would remain positive over the next three days
• That the side effects would be minimal this time
• That I can be an encouragement to Marc

We know that your prayers have sustained us in the past eight weeks when nothing else could. We have seen God at work in very amazing ways. We are often overwhelmed by His mercy and goodness. Who are we, that He should bless us so?

Thank you for your continued prayers. We need them.

With love and gratitude...